I'm actually doing it.
I am full on in the middle of training to be a career firefighter.
Everyday is a new challenge, it's getting harder for us every day and the rules are starting to tighten down on us. I can feel the leniency of the first day already beginning to fade, the workouts are harder and group oriented, if one of us is falling behind, we all suffer. There is pain in every part of what we do, and simply pushing through it to generate the best results possible is all that I can think about. I'm giving everything that I have to this program. It is my time to shine and show how marketable I truly am as a recruit. The days of me messing around and simply letting life pass me by are over, I have to work harder than I ever have in my entire life to prove that I am the best.
Sadly, I just ate the last bit of ice cream I'm going to allow myself for the remainder of the semester. A terrible thing (but not really) that is going to help me push my way to the top of my class. It's all the little things that are going to make a difference in where I end up.
As hard as it all is, I love every minute of it. The drills, the workouts, having someone yelling at me to push it and be better. To have to fight just to hold on for those last five seconds of an exercise.
On an entirely different note, I've had Frankie in my dreams for the last couple of nights, very vividly. I remember holding him last night, and just feeling an overpowering confidence and warmth coming over my entire body. Almost like he's helping me unlock my full self and my true potential.
I really miss the guy, he was a huge part of my life and will always be a part of who I am and how I act.
Animals, I have found, can exhibit unfathomable levels of love and compassion for creatures that we apparently see as subordinate to ourselves (humans.) But I truly believe that it is the other way around, and that in many situations that humans are the ones that should be learning from the animals around them.
Frankie was the best example of that in my life.
He lived to be very old, and I think very wise. He saw me grow up and play with him, which is simply something that cats do not want a part in. He saw me mature and let his guard down to me.
And then I saw it, the wisdom that is, in his eyes. He was tolerant of many cats coming and going from our household despite their personalities. And showed love for any and all people.
So I'm dedicating my efforts in the RCA to Frankie, and that I may too be able to show such unconditional tolerance.
